Dang You Wii

I have a love-hate relationship with our Wii. I love it because when I do the yoga and strength training exercises on it I do feel stronger. I do feel like my core is being strengthened. And it does motivated me to do more to get back to where my body just feels really good, really healthy, and really strong. I also love that it has games on it that challenge Zachary's core muscles and build's strength and balance that help his sensory issues in so many ways...and he doesn't even realize he is working.
I have moments though, where I despise that Wii with all the fury that is in me. And I confess, I have cussed it out a time or two. The thing knows all the right emotional buttons to push that nearly drive me to tears. "It's a machine. It can't trigger such an emotional response." Oh yes it can. Yes it can.
Today I hopped on for the first time in a while...3 months to be exact. When I stepped on the Wii board, instead of giving me a polite, "Welcome back Lindsey," the stupid Wii makes this sound, "Oh?" As if to say, "Yikes you heffer. Shouldn't have taken three montsh off of me. Help me. Help me. You are breaking my back." I know the thing doesn't have a back, but whatever. It sure as heck acts like it does! And then, has anyone customized their Mii? If you haven't done this before what you are doing is creating a character, that is supposed to resemble you, in the virtual Wii world. Pretty amazing actually. And I do love my mii. She always has great hair, an adorable pink shirt that doesn't have spit up all over it, and is constantly smiling. She's delightful really. Anyway, if you are going to use Wii Fit to get in shape you create your character and then you select your height and the size shape you think resembles you. After you have created your character you stand on the balance board and it weighs you. If you are a little heftier than your Mii would indicate the Wii will change your body type and make you more portly looking!!!!! I am not joking. It's unbelievable! Talk about making someone that could alreay be self conscious even more so!
Thank you very much Wii, but I did just have a 3rd child and am not back in fighting form yet. Was it totally necessary to make me look like I was 8 months pregnant again?! Nothing inspires me more at this moment to take the extra baby weight off then to hopefully gain the respect of my Wii, and gain some dignity back by having my Mii look fit and trim again.
Not as Hefty as That Thing Tells Me I Am,
The Joyful and Tired Mii, I mean, Mom

Has anyone seen Ashton Kutcher?

Has anyone seen Ashton Kutcher anywhere? I know he has to be around here somewhere. With all the craziness that has ensued in our home in the last 48 hours I am seriously waiting for him to jump out of our basement with his nasty trucker's hat on and yell, "You've been punked!" No kidding, I am honestly searching my house for a hidden camera because it is insane to think that all of the stuff going on in our home has been real! I am crying out here, "Please! Someone! Tell Me This Is A Joke!"
What's been going on you ask? Well you know I am more than happy to share this with the world. My family is a circus and I love them and I love everyday. But this week has pushed me to the edge. Mark and I go to bed each night laughing hysterically about the daily happenings around here. We laugh because the only other option would be to cry.
I'll start with Sunday:
Drew is in the process of potty training and doing a phenomenal job! He is basically potty training himself and Mark and I could not be more proud or relieved. On Sunday morning both boys ended up in our bed to snuggle and watch a little show before we went downstairs to start the day. Well, Drew's overnight had been taken off because he hates feeling wet. He was laying next to me and informed me he needed to go to the potty. He's pretty self-sufficient so I thought I would let him walk into his restroom to go. He proceeded to go downstairs, use the restroom, then crawl back into bed eating a frozen corndog. A FROZEN CORNDOG! And he ate it. He ate the frozen corndog. And in the midst of eating it he looked at me, while lounging in our bed and said, "I hold penis." So he had a terrific morning with corndog in one hand, penis in the other. Should I have said to him, "This is the top buddy. It'll never get any better than this moment right here."
Then, while getting ready for church Zachary started to get so nasty. His attitude was awful and so we sent him to his room for a time out and to cool off. I was thinking it would end in 5 minutes. Apparently Mark and I did not get the memo that Zachary was going to challenge us every moment of the morning. He would calm down, come out of his room, then get nasty again. He spent 40 minutes SCREAMING in his room. It was awful. Mark was the one going up every few minutes to try and talk him down, but nothing worked. So we knew we had to stand firm as the parents or the entire day was going to be a bust with him. We missed church because he wouldn't settle down. It was terrible. Then, we went downstairs and put Nate in his jumperoo. Mark looked over at Nate only to discover an enormous pile of diarrhea under him on our carpet. It was awesome. (Can you hear the sarcasm through the screen?)
Now for Monday:
Oh Monday...I don't miss you.
Nate woke up with a fever of 101.1. But even with Nate being sick I decided that when he took a nap, I would actually take a shower, dry my hair, put on makeup, and even put on perfume! I wanted Mark to come home to a wife that wasn't able to style her hair using her own oil from unwashed hair. I tried, but it didn't matter. Zachary was fantastic yesterday. Truly, best day we've had in a while. I am so grateful for him and his behavior yesterday. It was God's mercy on me because He knew I couldn't handle anything else.) Then, there is Drew...bless his little
heart. He has had a terrible cough since Friday. Yesterday the coughing took a turn for the worse and he started throwing up...everywhere. I was literally wading through vomit all morning. I would think that I had cleaned all of it off of the floor; then I would stand up and step in a chunk of vomit. I know. I know. I am being far too graphic, so I apologize. But really, I want you to have the full perspective regarding our day yesterday. He wouldn't eat. He wouldn't play. And I felt terrible because he wanted held, but sometimes I was just unable to put Nate down to hold him. So he just followed me around the house whining. And since he was at my heels all day when Nate decided it was time to throw-up while I was holding him it took less than 3 seconds for Drew to walk through it. I AM NOT EXAGERATING!!! It was truly unreal. And then when Mark finally came home I handed Nate to him only to discover Nate had not only had diarrhea all over himself, but all over me as well. No lie.
Yesterday I was literally coughed on, thrown up on, and pooped on. Un-freakin'-believable!
So last night before bed I gave my teeth a thorough brushing. Mark came into the room and I know he thought to himself, "Well if she is taking that much time to brush her teeth then surely..." (sorry mom). I was like, "No! The only reason I am spending this much time brushing my teeth is because it is 10pm and it's the first time I've brushed them today!" His response while laughing, "What? You aren't in the mood?" Oh how I love my husband. (no sarcasm) I really do love him. Last night we laid in bed and laughed hysterically about our day...how long it was...and how we hoped for a better day today.
And it has been a better day. The only mishaps today have been Drew pooping on the floor like a dog and Cali chewing up a dirty diaper that someone-who will remain nameless (not me)-left on the bathroom floor last night.
Until next time...
With sense of humor still intact,
The Joyful and Tired Mom

Beware of Dog

So today has been a semmi-stressful day. Zachary came down with a high fever this morning and cries because he feels so terrible. Drew has been, well, Drew. Mark affectionatly calls him "God's cruel joke" because he has this devilish personality, but is so insanely cute you can't be angry with him for long. And then Nate is a sweet little 6 month old baby that just requires a lot of attention, obviously. All of those things combined, and the fact that Mark is out of town for work today, makes what would have been a fun-filled day slightly stressful. How then do I have time to blog? Well, all 3 kiddos are taaking a nap right now and so I have a few minutes before someone inevitably wakes up and hour earlier than expected.
Because it has been a higher stress day I thought I would throw in some humor to entertain myself. And for those of you who know our dog, Cali, you'll get a kick out of this as well.
Cali is our 85 lb. Golden Retriever. She used to be fit and trim, but once we had Zachary and she was no longer my "baby" I felt tremendous guilt for the not-so-subtle shift in priorities and the lack of attention she was getting that I just started feeding her cheese. Tons and tons of cheese. (She prefers Kraft Singles, but any cheese will do.) I confess, I made my dog an emotional eater.
Something to also know about Cali is she is playful, has an addiction/obsession with fetching balls, has the kindest disposition, is very patient with 3 children grabbing at her all day, and is unbelievably submissive. An example: Several years ago Mark and I were walking Cali and there was a dachsund that was paralyzed in his back 2 legs, that had just had spinal surgery, walking on the sidewalk like a seal. Cali crawled over to the dog and then rolled over for this ferocious beast to sniff her belly and to show she wasn't a threat. I mean, honestly, it is laughable and so stinkin' sweet at the same time. With that said though, you must be getting the picture that there isn't an aggressive bone in her body.
Still though, there have been nights when I have been afraid or wondered what would happen if someone were to break into our home. I have visions of Cali being one of those heroic dogs that you hear about on the news that "saved it's family by jumping between their master and a bullet. Family and dog are recovering and fine."
Well today I was vaccuuming and the bag burst. It sounded like a gun shot. It was SO LOUD. The kids were, surprisingly, fine. No one was scared...except for our brave guard dog. I looked around and she was standing near the front door, craning her neck to see around the staircase into the family room to make sure everything was ok. I then opened the back door to let her out and she bolted to the back of our yard. Typically, when she does her business she walks right to the back door to come back inside. Not today. I opened the door to let her in and she was literally laying at the back of our yard by the swingset...not wanting to come inside. When I called her in she ran up the steps and I found her at the top of the stairs, longingly looking down the stairs, with a ball in her mouth. Drew and I had to go upstairs to console her and tell her everything was going to be alright. Once we did that she was fine. She came back downstairs with no memory of bailing on her family in a (theoretical) time of need.
Oh, our sweet girl Cali. Not quite the guard dog we had imagined you could be if the need ever arose.

The Unguarded,
Joyful and Tired Mom

From Teenagers to Now-You are Forever Friends

Whenever I run into someone I used to know from middle school or high school the question is inevitably asked, "So, do you keep in touch with anyone from high school?" Well, actually I keep up with/stalk on facebook about half of our graduating class. But truth be told I had the most wonderful friends in high school that are still part of my inner circle today. I would be a fool to let any of them slip away. They are the kind of friends that knew me during my years of teenage angst and loved me, or atleast put up with me, anyway. And they love me today as we all celebrate the joys of life and help one another through the sorrows. To them I say thank you and I love you.

A Few of My Forever Friends

There's my friend I have known the longest. We have shared laughter and tears. Snuck out together at night and TPed together. Run over a median together when learning to drive, and were thankfully, unharmed. Had boyfriends that couldn't stand each other because (what they didn't realize) they were exactly alike. Were two best friends that were stood up by two best friends (thanks Mark and Johnny). Was the first friend I told that I loved Mark. Held hands while a fiance was off at war. Stood by one another at our weddings. Had children together. And continue to share our lifes greatest and most difficult moments together. The kind of friend that in my darkest hour sat with me outside of my parents home until 1:30 in the morning and
cried with me when my world crashed down around me. And then stayed and took care of my children, went to the grocery store, bought me trashy gossip magazines, and did my laundry when all I could do each day was simply survive. The friendship that has not only survived the distance between us in miles, but has become stronger.

Then there is my friend I will affectionately call my "soul sister." She referred to us as that in our 30's; but said she always had an idea, even in our teens, that we were going to be "soul sisters." We fought over the same boys in high school. TPed homes together. Decorated the basketball guys homes in Graeter's cups and shirts (such dorks).
Dressed up in overalls and matching shoes with another girlfriend and pretended we were Charlie's Angels. Got caught doing "drive-by's" of the guy's homes we liked (oh my gosh, I am embarrassed even sharing that memory). Drove through town bustin' it to "Bone Thugs in Harmony" thinking we were cool and putting our lives on the line every time we got into her Grand Prix. It was this friend that led me back to the Lord when I was 20. She exuded a peace I had never known before...and I knew it was the Lord in her. It was at her wedding on June 3, 2000 that I watched her group of friends dancing on the dance floor and they were having so much fun and filled with so much joy that I finally decided to transfer to OSU and become a Young Life leader because they had what I desperately wanted: joy, freedom, life.
Our lives have been eerily similar throughout our 15 year friendship. I have been so fortunate to walk through lifes highs and lows with this friend. She has been my biggest cheerleader and great comfort in times of triumph and times of struggle. We laugh at who we used to be and embrace who we are today. And as our boys started prechool together we watched them run around the room hugging each other, then screaming at each other, then hugging one another again and we both looked at their teachers and said, "Good luck. That is so us."

Then there is the other Charie's Angel in the bunch. She is my friend that has ALWAYS made me laugh. Her family introduced my family to the church they continue to go to 18 years later. We were friends, then became neighbors. She used to drive me to school in her first car. We worked together at Graeter's where on our busy summer nights she would take an oven mit and pretend it was a puppet and tell everyone in line to go to Baskin Robbins. We spent the majority of our years living across the country from one another, and when she moved back home it was like Christmas for me.
We share the memories of youth group together. The memories of summer camps. We share broken hearts. We share dreams fulfilled. We walked along side one another as we married our incredible husbands. She loves my boys and always encourages me with a funny story that I have shared with her about them. She truly enjoys them. And we shared in the joys (ha) of pregnancy together. And when both of our boys were born she is the friend who invited me to dinner so we could eat lunch meat sandwiches, drink wine, and devour cookie dough together because we were no longer pregnant.

And then there is my friend who knows how to love people. Anyone and everyone who meets her loves her and feels loved by her. It's a gift. She is the friend that included me the moment
I joined a new team as a senior in high school. We dressed alike, made "XC jerseys" to hang on the wall at the entrance of our high school. We pretended to pose for pictures togther even when there was no camera. She helped me to embrace who I was...not who our society told me I should be. She was the first friend to visit me in the hospital when my first child was born. The first one to hold my newborn son that wasn't a parent or grandparent. She is the friend that always shows up at our doorstep when someone isn't well to bring a meal or a loaf of bread. She has chili cook-offs at her house and Olympic parties with medals made of candy bars. She is fun, authentic and kind. She and I have laughed together, cried together, and been total dorks together. And now I am fortunate enough that we get to raise our boy's together.


And then there is my other dear friend...the 3rd girl in our XC trio. She, too, posed for fake pictures with us and hung a "XC jersey" for the entire school to see(even though she may be embarrassed to admit it now). She has made me laugh till I cried. She has held my hand when I have been sad. Loved me in high school when I wasn't the greatest friend. And loved me in college on and off the lacrosse field when I was like a lost puppy just following her around because I so desperately wanted to have her confidence and zest for life. She loves me and loves my family and always puts a smile on the face of whoever is near.

For all of you, my dear friends, I am grateful. I realize that so much of this post was about what these friends have done for me over the years. But the reality is, each of these friends through the years has selflessly loved me
even when I was unlovable. I loved each and everyone one of you then. And I love each and everyone of you now. You truly are my forever friends.

Beautiful Disaster

Have you ever thought about what songs would make up the soundtrack of your life? As a music lover I often think about what songs would be on the soundtrack of my life, what songs I would want sung at my funeral (totally morbid, I know), and what songs represent who I am, what I believe and how I feel. No doubt, there would be a ton of Celine Dion on the soundtrack.

Well, yesterday I discovered another song I would need included in the soundtrack of my life. Yesterday was a perfect day. My mom and I took the boys to a playground and we were all sitting around taking a water break and playing with Nate and I just started singing the song, "I'm So Happy" by the Salteens. I discovered this rockin' group on Yo Gabba Gabba.

(Sidenote: For any of my fellow West Virginians reading this, does the lead singer totally remind you of Ryan Lewellyn, or am I just crazy?)



I was so happy. It was the perfect start to a pretty perfect day.

We came home from the park and my kiddos actually ate the lunch I made for them; and they were getting along beautifully. Then, at 11:55 a.m. things began to get crazy.

Drew stood up from playing with a racetrack and was pulling on his shirt. I looked over and he had had explosive diarrhea that came out of his diaper, up the front of his pants, all over the front of his shirt, streaming down his legs onto the carpet. I ran him upstairs, washed him off in the shower and started to get him dressed. That's when I heard Nate start cryng because he had just been awakened from his nap by Zachary hollering, "I have to go poop!" I frantically rush to get Drew dressed, put him down for his afternoon nap, come downstairs to pick up Nate...only to discover that he, too, has pooped. I change him just in time to hear Zachary yell, "I'm done!" I wipe him, dispose of all the diapers, wash my hands, and get Zachary up to his room for his quiet time. At that time Zachary remembered he had left his blankie and stuffed animals downstairs and started going down the stairs to get them. On his way down the steps he somehow lost his footing, flipped around and fell down the stairs upsidedown, on his back. It was terrfying, but thankfully he was ok...and all was well in the world again once Nanna brought him a frosty with sprinkles.
And when I looked at the clock again, it was 12:15.

All that to say...it was a crazy 20 minutes. But the day was still fantastically wonderful. That is why the title I would give for the day yesterday is "Beautiful Disaster." Because it was. The day had some difficulties, some hiccups...but it was beautiful, and wonderful, and so much fun.

Totally in Love with My Family,
The Joyful and Tired Mom